I don’t really remember waking up on the morning of June 13th 2009 but I suspect it was Izzy, then four and a half, that roused us from our slumber. As had become the habit during the last few weeks of pregnancy, I was left to try and sleep a little longer.
The last week had been particularly unbearable. Despite being pretty adamant I had my dates correct, the doctor at my 12 week scan had brought my due date forward by 7 days. According to this, that Saturday morning saw me 41 weeks pregnant.
When I realised we were expecting again I knew I wanted to try for a homebirth. Carl was supportive but sceptical. We talked a lot about his concerns, all very valid. What if something goes wrong, what about the mess, and so on. Ultimately though he knew I wouldn’t be comfortable going into hospital to give birth.
My father had died, in a hospital, when Izzy was only ten months old. What had been a simple dislike for such institutions evolved into something much darker. Being in hospital made me feel scared and sad, two emotions you certainly want to avoid when you’re giving birth. Finally, I found an article online written by a father of multiple homebirthed babies. Carl read it and seemed convinced at last.
But, as I sat in the corner of the kitchen waiting for the kettle to boil, the dull ache in my back suddenly turned into the intense pain of a contraction. I told Carl that, after all that, I might actually be going into labour. We phoned my Mum – my other birth partner – as she had an hour drive to get to us.
‘Call me when the contractions are 10 minutes apart’ she said. We phoned back within minutes to tell her they were coming very much closer together than that.
I set about gathering up Izzy’s bits and pieces up. We had always said we would follow her lead in terms of whether or not she wanted to stay at home while I laboured. We’d read lots of books together about home birth and she was definitely curious about the whole thing.
She was fine to begin with as I paced around our bedroom, I even managed to read to her in between contractions, but as the pain increased, and I needed to concentrate on my breathing a little more, I could see she was beginning to feel a little anxious. We asked if she wanted to stay with us or go and play at her friend’s house and she instantly opted for the latter. We phoned my friend Emily and she collected Izzy just minutes before the first midwife arrived.
We’re lucky to have a very big, deep bath that, when filled to capacity, completely covered me and my ample bump. It felt wonderful to be in the water with the sunlight streaming in through the bathroom window and my music playing.
The contractions were coming very fast, at times they felt like they were one on top of the other and I hardly had time to catch my breath. Carl and my mum massaged my lower back and I concentrated on breathing through the pain and visualising the baby moving down inside me.
I remember a brief time alone with my Mother in the bathroom. I began to feel quite teary. ‘I wish dad was here’ I said, and Mum silently nodded her agreement. Then we laughed. ‘Well, not here exactly’ I chuckled, as I remembered where I was and what I was doing!
There was actually lots of laughter and smiles in the bathroom that morning. Everyone was amused when I expressed my concern about how much water we were using. ‘We’re on a metre you know’, I said. Carl smiled and told me it was no time to be frugal.
The second midwife had arrived by the time I decided I didn’t want to be in the bath anymore. We moved into our bedroom where everything was set up for me to deliver. I can remember finding pushing much harder than I had with Izzy and it felt like it took ages (but, in reality, only took about half an hour).
Jesse’s colour wasn’t great to begin with but after a few minutes he was fine and feeding well. The midwife was visibly shocked when she weighed him and discovered he was 9lb 1oz. I’m quite tiny so it’s no wonder I was so uncomfortable during pregnancy, and it explains why he was a little harder to push out than my dinky 6lb 15oz daughter!
I was examined by the midwives and, after a quick shower, I climbed into bed with my new son. The midwives made me tea and toast and cleared everything up. You honestly wouldn’t even have known a baby had been born there, the place was spotless.
Carl went to collect Izzy and she came home to meet her baby brother. She was followed closely by both sets of grandparents and my sister. Later we all ate supper together while Jesse dozed in his car seat at the foot of the table.That was the best bit, having all the people we cared most about around us that evening.
I loved sleeping next to Carl that night with the moses basket beside us too. It was just the perfect ending.
I still get butterflies when I look at the spot of the bathroom floor that welcomed Jesse that afternoon.
Happy Birthday baby boy!
Loveaudrey xxx
PS. A slightly different version of this birth story {which includes a few more of the gorier details} has already appeared on The Baby Wife.
PPS. Words cannot describe how much I loathe that cheap, pink Primark nightgown in the photo of me holding my newborn son.
Omg, this must be the cutest birth story ever! It actually makes me want to have a baby. In far far future, that is.
Happy Birthday to Jesse!
Gorgeous story… I think a home birth is a very good plan, I’m all for it in fact! However as Sam was 11.7 at birth and me being 5’2 and a tiddler of a baby I’m not sure it will be a complication free birth… Once we’ve decided to actually get pregnant that it!
Happy birthday to Jesse!
Happy Birthday little chap. Lovely post x
wow, you have totally brought a tear to my eyes reading this. What an amazing thing and well done on sticking to your guns about what you want. Happy birthday to your gorgeous little boy x
Aww this is absolutely lovely, you always tell things so well. Many happy returns to Jesse, hope he has a memorable 3rd birthday! He so reminds me of my nephew George (also 3), he’s such a cutie xx
I have tears in my eyes, what a lovely story to start the morning with! You really have made giving birth to a 9lb baby easier for me to stomach, I am only 5ft2 but my fiance is 6ft2, we could end up with a 9lb ‘er! Happy Birthday Jesse!x
Ah a little tear trickled down my cheek then. Partly because of your beautiful writing, partly because of the beautiful tale and partly because things like this always make your reflect on your own birth stories. I think all of those things are the sign of a truly great writer.
Happy Birthday Jesse from Charlie, Chloe, Lola and probably Graham too if he was aware it was such an important day.xx
Beautiful, inspiring and full of love.
Happy Birthday Jesse and happy being a mummy for the second time day to you!
Enjoy making more memories today x
Ah i wish i would have had a home birth! but its so lovely to read this, makes me think of my own two births, and your little boy is totes adorable! Happy Birthday!
Well thank you for sharing this -I was having a rather crappy morning & this was just the sweetest thing. It totally cheered me up.
My daughter turns 5 this year and I still remember her birth like it was last weekend. Happy birthday to your sweet [no longer a baby] boy! 🙂
Note to self – invest in nice, post pushing baby out nightie
Beautiful writing as always my lovely
xxx
This made me cry, in a good way. Your writing is so evocative and emotive, I felt as if I were there almost, squeezing your hand. Happy Birthday darling Jesse xxx
Ahh I loved this post! A home birth sounds lovely. Happy Birthday Jesse! X
You write so, so beautifully. Loved this post. Loved reading the story. Happy birthday, beautiful boy. x
This is a lovely story, Happy birthday Jesse! x
I was kindly directed to your story by Lydia [http://www.lydiasparkles.com/] after talking about home birth on my blog – and I reading your story has made me feel more positive than ever that it’s the right thing. Such a lovely, well written post to read.
Sadly my dad passed away during this pregnancy and I feel similarly about hospitals, so am keeping everything crossed [except my legs] that we will meet our second baby at home too 🙂 Congrats on making a boy – a very beautiful one at that 🙂 x